On the Road

This weekend, Rachael has auditions in Connecticut and New York. Because of this, I have just finished making reservations for a stay at a beautiful economy motel in southern Connecticut. The name of this palace will remain anonymous in an effort to avoid any potential lawsuits. Out of all the hotels that approached fitting my budget, this one, according to online reviews from past customers, seemed to strike the right balance between bedbugs and prostitution. Sure, there were the usual comments like, “STAY AWAY!” or “NEVER AGAIN!!”, but you have to take those with a grain of salt. Who’s going to believe someone with a name like “Sally from Nova Scotia”?

My biggest concern, aside from price, was wondering if I was booking us into some kind of crack house. But except for one malcontent named “Henry”, no one seemed to have much to say about the drug dealers. And even “Henry” admitted that the police did eventually show up.

One person took exception to the appearance of the place, little things like dirty windows and holes in the walls. Is that all? I wish my house was that nice. Someone else complained about the “threadbare carpets”. Give me a break. If you don't like the carpet, you should have paid the extra charge to sleep on a bed.

Even with these minor inconveniences, I look forward to staying in room that has such advertised amenities like a TV and a desk. I’m not sure if there’s a bathroom, but we’ll deal with that when we get there. After a long day, all I’m looking forward to is a floor to lay down on. It will feel good to kick back and relax under the desk, at least until it’s my turn to watch out the window and see if the car is getting broken into.

Alas, after only one brief night, Rachael and I will be moving on to NEW YORK CITY where she will have her final two auditions of the month. We’ll be moving on, that is, assuming my car hasn’t been stolen the night before because one of us fell asleep on their watch (thanks a lot, Rach).

I’m sure Rachael will do a great job, like usual. But I think I’ll deserve at least some of the credit by allowing her to get infested with bedbugs along the way, thereby enhancing her monologues with some sweet moves.

You’re welcome Rachael.