Evening Rituals

Occasionally, in the long ago, pre-pandemic, still in school, days, Sam and his then job coach would take a break from whatever it was they were doing and stop at a local coffee shop where his job coach would buy a cup of coffee (I assume) and Sam would buy an apple juice (I also assume) and often, Sam would buy a copy of the local newspaper.

Sam and his job coach would sit in the coffee shop and sometimes do a little work together. Other times, they would just take a break - the job coach would spend some time typing away on his laptop, usually sending me an update about Sam, and Sam would read the newspaper.

As I'm sure I've also mentioned before (and will likely continue to mention) Sam would sit and read quietly, out load, in a style that this former job coach accurately described as "un-rushed." This was Sam's style back then and this is Sam's style now.

Since the pandemic though, Sam has, unfortunately, been forced to stop buying the local newspaper. Instead, we started a subscription to the newspaper's online digital version. It's been a good investment.

Over the last many months since subscribing, at some point, it has become an important part of our nightly, pre-bedtime ritual. Sam comes down from his shower, sits down at the computer, then calls over to me and asks if I wanted to read a couple of articles with him. The answer, no matter how tired I am, is always, "Sure!".

I somehow manage to haul myself off the couch, head over to the table, spin the dining room chair around and I plunk myself down next to Sam as he scrolls through the day's stories. One-by-one he reads through the headlines and together we make a decision about which stories sound interesting enough to delve into further and which ones we want to avoid.

Favorite stories involve things such as helping the needy or stories about food banks and meals programs, stories about Warm-the-Children drives and stories about helping the homeless. Cute animal stories are also at the top of the list. 

Least favorite stories include anything involving violence, stories about someone not being considerate to someone else, or greedy, self-interested political grifters. (All too often, many of these stories include all three.) Stories about lives lost or loved ones lost are also not on our list of favorites - even though sometimes we'll read them anyway.

When Sam is done reading, I'll lean over, give him a brief hug, kiss him on the head - and thank him for keeping me updated. I usually say something along the lines of, "Thanks, Sam. I wouldn't know what was going on if it wasn't for you." (Which, by the way, is true.) And even though he always answers with a "you're welcome," I sometimes wonder if this part of our ritual matters to him one way or the other- or is it something he puts up with for my benefit.

The other night, when Sam finished reading the nightly updates, I was a little slow with my usual lines. Sam turned and looked at me, leaned over, gave me a big hug - and thanked me for reading with him. 

Maybe this was only for my benefit...and maybe it wasn't. Either way, I'll take it.