My oldest cousin Richard passed away since I last wrote. I, along with Steve, Karen and Mom went to his wake. I hate going to those things- mostly because I have nothing to offer in the way of comfort.
I never saw much of Richard. When I was growing up, I saw him maybe once or twice a year- if he happened to be there on one of the visits to my grandparents house. In later years, I saw him even less. There’s a span of at least twenty years when I don’t think I saw him at all. He came to Dad’s funeral, and was able to come to a couple of our family get togethers. Other than that though, I didn’t really see him at all.
For years, I could never figure out exactly how we were related. I was told that he was my cousin, but this made no sense to me. He seemed more like an uncle to me, except he wasn’t. It turns out he was the oldest son of my aunt, who was the oldest of four kids in her family- my dad being the youngest. I’m not sure what the spread was between Dad and his sister, but this put Richard at a little over twenty-five years older than me. This, plus the fact that he had a different last name than just about everyone everyone else at my grandparents house was totally confusing.
He had a color TV way before we did. Way, way before we did. The only reason I know this is because my sister Karen babysat for him at least once. I remember hearing, way more than once, how much better “Walt Disney’s Wonderful World of Color” was in actual color.
I always liked Richard in the way that I liked my Uncle George. They always had a smile. At family gatherings, either one of them would always acknowledge me, and ask a little bit about what was going on. And it was never done in a way that made me feel singled out or that put me in some kind of uncomfortable spotlight. This took some effort and toning down on their part, and I appreciated that.
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It’s tax time for me- and almost everyone else in this country. Unlike other years, I’m not getting anything back. It looks like I’ll be paying in- and fairly substantially, near as I can tell right now. So, that’s great news.On the bright side, I don’t need to get the taxes done in order to fill out a FAFSA this year. This has to be the first time that’s been the case in seven or eight years- maybe more.
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It’s also IEP time, which I hate. I’ve mentioned the IEP process elsewhere in this blog. This year’s IEP review has been stretching on, basically since last May- though we did have a break through the summer. There are a lot of reason’s for this-almost all of them have to do with the usual reason of not wanting Sam to get screwed. It’s never easy and it’s never fun. This year I feel the added pressure of graduation, still off in the distance, but getting within sight. There’s a growing low level panic knowing that a deadline is on the horizon- no matter how far the horizon may be.
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We had to have a plumber come to the house the other day. Our kitchen faucet had been dripping for about the last two or three years- unless you placed the lever in exactly the right position. Over time, the field of error in finding this position was getting narrower and narrower and the lever was getting more and more wobbly- until last week, when it broke off entirely. This happened to be the night before a blizzard. Naturally, I had nobody but myself to blame for this- even though I tried. I should have planned for it to happen. But that’s not my way. My way is to be walking around the house with a hammer and a broken sink faucet in my hands the night before a blizzard, and acting surprised that this had to happen.This was going to have to be fixed. It was obvious that despite my best salesmanship, Sam wasn’t going to live with a pair of vice grips clamped onto the naked faucet stem for a handle, and I have to admit, it would have been a little too “Ma & Pa Kettle”, even for me. So, knowing I finally had to bite the bullet and try to find a plumber, I yanked all the stuff out from under the sink- only to find pools of water. Apparently the drain had been leaking too, and for quite some time- judging by the swamp-like smell. All that were missing were the mosquitoes.
The plumber, whom Helaina had found for me through a co-worker, worked out great. I called him the next morning and he was over and done by later that afternoon. This, in spite of the blizzard.
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Speaking of the blizzard, my back is still killing me from shoveling the snow. I made a note to myself that I need to get in shape. I’ll stick the note with the other notes, once I remember where I put them.
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I have a post I’ve started, maybe a half a dozen times, on death and dying. I never get to the point of posting it. I think this is mostly for two reasons. First, if I were to post it, I fear my insurance company is going to point at it after I’m gone and say “See, we can’t give you your $150 (pre-tax) windfall because he was obviously planning it ahead of time”. I don't plan ahead for anything (see the faucet story above), but it’s one of those things that eventually happens regardless (also see the faucet story above). The other reason I don’t do anything with it is I don’t think it quite fits in here. Despite the title “On Death and Dying”, it’s not actually funny. Maybe it will see the light of day at some point.
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Last Saturday, I drove Jake down to take something called GRE. This testing is apparently required by some schools if you want to go after more than a four year degree. Like so many other things regarding higher education, I knew nothing about it. I did learn a few things about it though. I learned that if you’re going to take the test, you have to go through more security than at Fort Knox (or so I would imagine). I learned that you need a valid ID to take the test, and that a drivers license that had expired three weeks earlier is not considered a valid ID- even though it has your picture on it and there is no one else in the entire United States that has your name, and no, they will not take a student ID, a birth certificate or a Social Security card. I learned that even though the Registry is not open on Saturdays, you can renew your driver’s license at a AAA- as long as it’s before 1:00 and you’re a card carrying member. I learned that even though I am a card carrying member, it doesn’t cover Jake, and that if he wants to renew his license in the next twenty minutes before they close, he needs to be one- or I am out the testing fee.
So, I killed time at the over crowded mall and the over crowded Barnes and Noble and took a nap in the car, and Jake took the four and a half hour test. I ended up with a couple of discounted books and Jake got a AAA membership.
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Sam and I saw the Lego movie on Sunday. This was his idea, and I think this was the first time he ever broached an idea of doing something like this. Usually it’s me trying to drag him somewhere. I was pretty surprised by it. We went to the local theater and I had a good time. I noticed later that night, when he was on the computer, he was watching clips of the movie on Youtube. I felt pretty good about that. I think it meant he also had a good time.
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I find I’m missing the kids a lot lately. I think I always do, but I think it’s worse than usual at this time of year.At least, that's the excuse I tell myself.
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